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Gordon's D-Zone Arcive (2006-2014)

Thursday, April 19, 2007

TRANSFORMATIONS

I’ve made a lot of transitions in my life that are too personal to blog about. Right now, life has been occupied by my studies and work of course which means I find that I’ve got a little time for myself. However, I know that there are things that are part of my life that I sometimes wished were not part of it. And I’m speaking of my impairment if you haven’t got that by now.

I often wondered what my life would be like if things were not like they are now. Would I have had less tough experiences? Would people have liked me more? Would people like me more if I were not disabled? Would I have my own TV show and fan club?

Perhaps not the last one but I cannot deny that people might be reluctant to approach a wheelchair user without having thought about it twice or three times. And this is not just about me, it’s about them really. If I were to put it bluntly, do they think I am going to bite them? Or that I am harboring a contagious virus? Or even that by relating to me they risk of becoming like me?

I have gone a long way since I started out this blog. I underwent a series of transformations even before that. The greatest one, however, is one, which hasn’t happened before. This transformation does not involve changing myself or making myself more attractive to others. It will take a shift of culture and of society, which will not deny me the status I have as a human being.

And believe me, this is not simply about rights to employment or education. Not just those at least. It means being outside with people doing what other people do, expressing what I want like other people do and being free to do whatever other people are allowed to do without the risk of being patted on the head or talked down to.

That is my dear blog followers, the ultimate transformation. Then, perhaps, I would be saved a lot of embarrassment to waiters when they discover I can speak my mind.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

MY X-FILE X-LIFE ...
(Left: Intro graphic of The X-Files series)

I have considered myself a fan of this science fiction series for most of my late teens but now I’m really not finding it much to my liking. Not that the many murders and unsolved cases do not intrigue or interest me but as I re-watch some of the episodes I had viewed as a young adult I am rather disappointed err in myself…

I should have seen it long time coming. But I couldn’t really put my finger on it. I mean how many times have wheelchair users got a bad reputation … a Hindu with no limbs who kills people by playing with their minds, a wheelchair user who kills people by telepathy, a blind girl who is the reincarnated soul of a man who kills those who have killed ‘him’ in the past, a janitor with learning disabilities who kills people for sports, some people with mental health issues on murderous frenzies, etc. etc. Those are some of the episodes I can recall right now.

I might have been more open to artistic licenses in the past but it’s always the one who is different, or who has an impairment, or of course aliens, mutants and whatever your creepy nightmares might conjure are there. But what makes me different from aliens or other imaginary beings is that my life is difficult enough as it is without people getting funny ideas about my sinister life.

And no I don’t have a sinister life if I may add. But often, as with the fascination people might have with aliens or the supernatural, disabled people are often examined and scrutinized from outside and judged from outside. And my impairment may become my blessing or my curse, depending on who is judging.

Yep, the truth was out there but if you’re searching for answers to the questions surrounding impairment, you won’t find them in The X-Files. But perhaps I should take it with a pinch of salt. But with many people only looking at our lives from such sources, I am afraid that they are still wondering about whether I am really an alien trying to blog way to world conquest.