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Gordon's D-Zone Arcive (2006-2014)

Monday, May 28, 2007

THIS IS THE TRUTH

How many times I have found myself saying this after someone has told me something about myself. Or else read an article. Or even watched a TV programmed. What truth?

Well, I cannot but say that I was a confused child, and was even more so when I started off hitting the age of 13. I won’t reveal anything that is private, secret or intimate here of course. I have my standards. But then, what am I all on about?

I have grown to believe that I am a unique person with things that no other person can give to the world. So far so good… but then if I should for a minute mention my impairment … well… hey presto…

“I You must be quite brave to go on living given your condition, not to mention you are unable to walk properly…”

Intended to make me feel good about myself, or:

“Your cross is an inspiration to all of us…”

Uttered by a member of the church. If only he knew what went through my mind… but a classic one is of course:

“WHAT A SWEET CHILD…” (Pat on the head)

How’s that for my self-esteem? How will I ever recover from such a persistent traumatic experience… can this ever stop? Nope. I guess.

But as every self-respecting disabled person can tell you, all this doesn’t help you a single bit when you’re out making friends. Or even making contact via Internet. I sometimes wonder whether it’s foolish of me to state in my profile that I’m a disabled person. I could be so many people. Yes, really.

But it’ll be fun for a while. Until I’ll have to return back to be myself. And then what… I do not know how to describe myself. I change so rapidly. Err… if I relied on others to make their minds up about who I am. I’ll blame my impairment of course. For confusing other people.

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